Belonging in Schools: Why It Matters and How to Build It

In May 2023, United States Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy released a new Surgeon General Advisory, calling attention to a public health crisis of loneliness, isolation, and lack of connection in America. As part of this advisory, Dr. Murthy described loneliness as an epidemic on par with tobacco use or obesity. 

“Loneliness is like hunger,” he said. “A signal we’re lacking something for survival.”

Dr. Murthy’s comments coincide with a report released earlier in 2023 saying that the rates of loneliness reported among young adults have risen every year for more than a decade. The report had its share of staggering facts, one of which is that teenagers spend nearly 70% less time hanging out with friends in 2020 than they did in 2003: 40 minutes a day with friends, down from 140 minutes.

When we chat with school leaders, it’s evident that this crisis of loneliness—for students and adults alike—is on everyone’s mind. We’re all wondering, “What’s the solution?”

For Dr. Murthy, the solution is to increase our level of human connection. Connection happens when a school community collectively feels supported, respected, and accepted by one another. It happens when those in your community feel like they belong. Similar to school culture, student belonging isn’t something that can be left to chance. School belonging happens by intention. 

Similar to school culture, student belonging isn’t something that can be left to chance. School belonging happens by intention. 

How do we define “belonging?”

First, it’s important to remember that there are what Vanderbilt University professor Eric Carter refers to as “dimensions of belonging,” As part of his ongoing work with students who have intellectual and developmental abilities, Carter outlined eleven terms that students and educators he works with often use to convey their belonging. These include feeling welcomed, known, present with, accepted, invited in, involved, heard, supported, befriended, needed, and loved. These dimensions often overlap, and it’s just as much about what you’re getting from a particular group as what you’re giving. 

As for a definition, Carter’s thoughts dovetail with the definition Geoffrey Cohen offers. Cohen, a Stanford researcher and author of the book Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides, says that “Belonging is the feeling that we’re part of a larger group that values, respects, and cares for us—and to which we feel like we have something to contribute.” 

In this sense, school belonging can more easily be described as “having a home” — either physically or metaphorically. And it’s this feeling of home that can be the impetus for student success, academic achievement, and growth in K-12 schools. This is why belonging matters.

In this sense, belonging can more easily be described as “having a home” — either physically or metaphorically. And it’s this feeling of home that can be a catalyst for achievement and growth in K-12 schools.

Creating this sense of home starts with ensuring you’re centering student belonging in your work with your own school community. Here are a few leadership practices to keep in mind: 

Center belonging in your school’s mission, vision and values

Your school’s vision is so much more than words on a page or a poster—it’s a light that leads everyone in your community. When challenging situations occur, your school vision is a guidepost that helps you determine what’s most important. And, that includes your commitment to a school climate rooted in belonging.

When Washington D.C.’s Van Ness Elementary School created their core values, for example, one of them was to “provide a safe supportive community to maximize learning for each student.” The school showed they were living that value by ensuring all students received a healthy breakfast and lunch;prioritizing the hiring of a school social worker, psychologist, and nurse; and putting an emphasis on academic success as well as social-emotional learning skills. 

Living your mission, vision, and values can also be done in small ways. It can be as simple as this principal, who asked his students to recite the school’s mission statement during the daily morning announcements every day. The mission statement focused on diversity and inclusion, and the repetition of the statement helped to infuse this sentiment throughout the school. Or, it can be similar to the work of this teacher, who has used the yearly co-creation of vision statements with her students to set expectations and align her classroom with the overall vision of the school community. 

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Prioritize cultural responsiveness in your leadership

One of the main causes of loneliness is social isolation, and a lack of cultural responsiveness in our communities’ schools might be one of the reasons for this isolation. When individuals from diverse cultural backgrounds do not feel understood or included, it’s easy for them to experience feelings of alienation, instead of connectedness.

One of the main causes of loneliness is social isolation, and a lack of cultural responsiveness in our communities’ schools might be one of the reasons for this isolation. 

For this reason, placing importance on cultural responsiveness—where we use the customs, characteristics, experiences, and perspectives of our school communities as tools for better school cultures and learning—is one of the best ways we can help students, teachers, staff, and parents affirm their identities. This is a crucial part of belonging, and especially true for those in our communities who have been historically underserved and underestimated.

There are a myriad of components that can be considered culturally responsive—high expectations for all students, an appreciation and understanding of different communication styles, a strong knowledge base around cultural diversity, culturally relevant curricula, prioritizing representation in hiring, and much more. Together with that is a necessary dose of self-reflection. Leaders need to take the time to understand their own unique identities—individual characteristics, family dynamics, historical factors, and other elements—so they’re able to build out cultural responsiveness in their schools. 

Build community recognition into your daily activities

Consider how you felt the last time you were recognized for a job well done. Chances are your self-esteem got a little boost, you were more engaged in the work for the long-term, and you felt a deeper sense of connection with your community. 

These feelings are no different for the students, teachers, staff, and parents in your care. Recognition not only enhances engagement and participation, it also increases trust and builds healthy relationships. And there’s a link to easing loneliness as well: the more people feel recognized and appreciated, the less likely they are to feel alone. Having your contributions recognized by others—especially those in your same social groups—boosts self-worth and confidence. 

Recognition not only enhances engagement and participation, it also increases trust and builds solid relationships. And there’s a link to easing loneliness as well: the more people feel recognized and appreciated, the less likely they are to feel alone.

There are plenty of ways to recognize individuals or groups within your school publicly through awards and public praise, but it’s often the understated forms of appreciation that are more meaningful. With students, recognition might look like a quick interaction in the hallway (“I’ve heard how hard you’ve been working in math over the last few weeks, and I’m so proud of you!”) or a positive note home to their parents. For teachers and staff, it might be the opportunity for professional development or acknowledgement in a team meeting. And for parents, it might mean being more intentional about soliciting feedback and involving them in school decision-making. 

Your leadership actions can be a catalyst for belonging

As a school leader, you have the opportunity and responsibility to help cultivate social connections among your community. For many of your students, parents, teachers, and staff, school might be one of the only consistent in-person gathering spaces they have. As we said before, belonging matters—and it improves student engagement and learning outcomes too! 

Why not make our schools places where we seek to eliminate loneliness and create places where people feel seen, heard, and valued for exactly who they are? 

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